The Heart Of Guidance

Counseling is considered as the most intimate and vital part of guidance program. It is also known as the "heart of guidance". Most of us define counseling as to what it is not. counseling is not lecturing. It is not just talking and definetely, it is not mere giving advice. Counseling is a consulation, an interview or it may also be means of helping people in overcoming their weaknesses and solving their problems. It can also be an aid to a person by assiting him with his attitudes, feelings and emotions.

For me counseling is not only talking about problems. it may also be as simple as sharing my experiences to someone whom I completely trust. It doesn't mean that I am only entitled to ask some counseling from my guidance counselor. I may also ask my friends, family or even our Parish Priest. Counseling is not merely asking for pieces of advice. Sometimes, I just want someone to listen to me and comfort me. I had encountered counseling before. I usually seek help whenever I am emotionally stressed from burdens of workload from school, peer pressure and of course, family problems. I can say that more often than not, I seek counseling and more often than not, I go to our Parish priest. I am not shy about it because I know I have nothing to be ashamed of. Accepting that you are weak makes you strong, yes, I know it is ironic. but for me, it's true. People who can't accept their weaknesses or people who can't accept that they committed mistakes are coward. Nobody is perfect, that's why we all need someone to be with when our burden is killing us.

Accorsing to Carl Rogers, an effective counselor must possess these qualitites:

""If I want to become an effective helper, I must begin with myself"

Yes, self awareness and values are important as well. Personality is the principal tool in helping people. Sometimes, the pieces of advice that you give is based upon from your own experiences. one must know how to develop her strength and overcome her weaknesses. With these, she will be able to see strength in others and help them overcome their weaknesses because she was in their shoes once. She should also solve her own problems first before trying to help others or else she will be causing more conflicts to the one that she is trying to help because she is emotionally distressed as well.

"Tender, Loving, Care"

The most famous TLC. One must be warmth and caring as a counselor. Everyone needs this especially those who are emotionally unstable, troubled, hurt and confused. We can show TLC by our own willingness to listen and to spend time with them, sensitivity to their needs and a genuine interest and concern in their welfare.

"A person who is accepted is free from fear and is often ready to deal with her problem"

Yes, acceptance is thus important. to become an effective counselor, one should never judge or stereotype a person especially with her physical appearance. Everyone is created in the image and likeness of God, and everyone is UNIQUE. Comparing people and bickering them won't help them. More so, you will make them more miserable. We want to convey to the people that we are helping that we accept them for what they are and for what they are not, for what they can become and what they can't be. admit it, No one is the same as the others. Like what I've said, Nobody is perfect.

"A good heart is not enough"

Helper needs to have knowledge of what it takes to help people. Helping people is not easy, I must admit. That's why Knowledge is important as well. It's not only being nice, good and affectionate that will help them. It is also the things that you can share for them to solve their problems. The process of helping, how problems develop and how to deal with problems are some points that a counselor needs to be aware of. Sometimes it's not also just mere helping or listening, Understanding is also needed and very important. Helper should continuously read books, articles and magazines that will give her more ideas on the technicals

thus we should not forget that "it is important to remember that an effective helper should be rooted in Christ, the greatest counselor of all times, should be her foundation"

if we walk with him, in his way and in his path, nothing will be wrong. He will guide as in whatever we do. We should always pray and thank him for everything.

Beauty Within

Is beauty of real value? In my case, it is because beauty is something that I value so much. I don’t mean the, “Oh look at that girl, she’s gorgeous….” type of beauty, but a beauty you can see when you look at the stars on a clear night, or maybe the look of joy on someone’s face when he or she is happy. That is true beauty. To look at something and see it more than it really is. When you look at someone, what do you see? Do you see the outer appearance, the formed mask made for the public eye? Or do you see the sober faces of waif thin super models with lustrous looks and elegant clothes? Or are you looking beyond that, into the part where no one else dares to look, the piece of that person that can either make you laugh or cry. If we fit to know the real characters of these people, would we still consider them worthy of the said title? When you judge someone and forget to love him or her unconditionally, you are cheating yourself out of infinite amount of beauty in this world. You are in control. Looking, interacting and living with people, my eyes have begun to seek the person within, not the outer shell. I want to know the real person. I will look deeply at someone and love him for what he truly is. I want to see beauty undefined and unexplored. Beauty is not only heeded through the surface. We have to dig a deeper hole to uncover its true significance. Someone who is slightly different from us is beautiful. Someone whose clothes are a bit peculiar is also beautiful. Our bitter comments and shallow outlooks make them seem otherwise. Some people are always busy bickering behind our backs and pointing out our individualities that they fail to behold the oblivious fact that all of us are indeed beautiful. This just goes to show how most people value masks over sincere faces. We are all in the position to either make someone feel terrible about himself or to make him feel a lot better. I am sure you know which the better choice is. Look inside yourself and you can really fathom that therein lies a precious gem that is waiting to be uncovered... you are beautiful.  All of us are. Next step, make others feel beautiful as well.  In that simple act of kindness, we could make this world, a better and happier place to live in.

Munting Tinig

      Madilim ang paligid at pilit kong minumulat ang aking maliliit na mga mata. Pilit kong ginagalaw ang aking maliliit na kamay at paa. Ako ay nasasabik sa aking mga naririnig sa paligid. Ako ay labis na nasasabik sa pagdating ng tamang araw. Bawat araw ay aking sinusubaybayan. Bawat araw sa akin ay isang regalong bigay ng Poong Maykapal. Maraming katanungan ang sa aking isip ay naglalaro. Ano kaya ang magiging itsura nila? Ano kaya ang lugar na aking kalalakihan? Ano kaya ang naghihintay na kapalaran sa akin? Ang tanging alam ko lamang ay mabait sa akin ang Ama kung kaya’t hindi niya ako pababayaan. Walang araw na hindi ako nangarap. Walang araw na hindi ako nasabik. Nais ko nang madama ang kanilang mahihigpit na yakap, ang matatamis na halik, ang masasarap na pag aaruga at pagkalinga.

            Ngunit sa aking paghihintay, ako ay biglang nagdalamhati. May kung anong matulis na bagay ang unti-unting tumutusok at kumikitil sa aking maliit na katawan. Bawat bahagi ay naaabot ng matulis na bagay. Hindi ko malaman kung ano ang aking gagawin. Sigaw ako ng sigaw.  Iyak ako ng iyak. Wala akong tigil sa paghingi ng saklolo sa kung sino mang may mabuting puso ang makakarinig sa akin. Habang tumutusok sa akin ang mahabang bagay na iyon, unti-unting bumalik sa aking munting alaala ang aking pinakasasabikan: ang mga yakap, halik at pag-aaruga. Mga bagay na hindi ko na mararamdaman kailanman. Napakasakit ng aking sinasapit. Dahan-dahan kong nararamdaman ang dugong pumapatak. Unti-unti akong nanghihina at naisipan kong magdasal, “Ama, maraming salamat sa maikling buhay na iyong ipinagkaloob sa akin. Nawa’y mapatawad mo ang aking minamahal na ina... hindi po niya naiintindihan ang kaniyang ginagawa.”

            Ang aking malakas na sigaw ay dahan-dahang nawawala. “Ina, hindi ko alam kung ano ang iyong dahilan kung bakit mo ito ginagawa. Ako pa naman ay nananabik na makita at mahalin ka. Lagi mong pakatatandaan na ikaw ay aking papatnubayan. Ang akin lamang dasal ay sana naipadama ko man lamang sa iyo ang aking pagmamahal. Sana ang susunod sa akin ay bibigyan mo na ng pagkakataong madama ang iyong pag- aaruga, pagmamahal at pagkalinga…” Ito ang mga huling katagang manggagaling mula sa aking munting tinig na hindi na kailanman maririnig.